Best & Worst Celebrity Beach Bodies
June 30th, 2008 by Rian | Filed under Miscellaneous Celebrities, Tabloid Magazines, Celeb Flab and Bulges.
Cover image via In Touch Weekly
It’s that time of the year again… Summertime, where the tabloids scrutinize celebrities in their swimsuits! (Yes, I know, we do that here all the time). 
Anyway, since I can’t scan the article in for you all to read, I will break it all down about who won which titles and why. There are a few pictures at the end of this post that show some of the supposed problem areas on various celebrities.
The Best:
- Katherine Heigl and Audrina Partridge made the “Hot List” because they are curvy yet fit.
- Jennifer Aniston and Kate Hudson won the “Best Shoulders” category. Jennifer used her hotel’s elliptical machine every day while filming the movie “Marley & Me” in Miami. Kate Hudson has been playing tennis lately with Lance Armstrong.
- Mario Lopez, Orlando Bloom, Gavin Rossdale and Hugh Jackman won the “Best Chest” category.
- Matthew McConaughey won the “Best Arms” category. He claims to jog, do push-ups and sit-ups to keep fit and muscular.
- Melanie Brown looks better than ever. She claims to add paprika and cayenne pepper to her foods in order to boost her metabolism!
- Pierce Brosnan reportedly got “rid of his gut” by taking up paddle surfing.
The Worst:
- Tara Reid has a lumpy stomach from botched procedure.
- Heidi Klum won the “Worst suit” category after wearing a bikini that just didn’t seem to fit her right.
- Mariah Carey’s suddenly ripped abs are looking suspiciously like a lipo procedure (which she denies).
- Patricia Heaton doesn’t seem to have a visible belly button!
- Arnold Schwarzenegger swapped bench-pressing for politics, and it shows! Where he once had muscles of steel, he now has lots of flab.
- And of course, Britney Spears made this list… her bulging stomach in a somewhat recent bikini photo looks awful.
- As we all know by now, Mischa Barton has a LOT of cellulite.
- Colin Farrell is way too thin. (But we all know it’s for a movie role).
- Reese Witherspoon looks like she has put some weight on since dating jake Gyllenhaal.
- Rob Lowe has packed on a few pounds in the tummy area.
- Dean Cain used to have a hard body, but not so much anymore…
I have included a few pictures that show some of the “problem areas” for certain celebrities that were mentioned under the “worst” section.
Here is Britney’s “bulging belly”:
Pierce Brosnan paddling to get fit:
Tara Reid’s lumpy stomach:
Story source: In-Touch Weekly, July 7th 2008 issue
Katherine Heigl is not fit. She has cellulite and her legs are too fat for the rest of her body. It’s obvious that she does not like to work out.
First?
Let’s not dwell on the “political correctness” of it all…… basically, if you’re fat, don’t wear a bikini….. there really should be size limits on those sorts of things…
Also, if you’re thin, if you work out & have no cellulite because you actually take pride in your body (& other people’s eyes) wear whatever the fuck you want!!!!!
You can be in the best shape in the entire world and still have cellulite. It isn’t all based on how much fat you have. When Jessica Simpson was in “The Dukes of Hazzard” she had cellulite and the girl was eating 1200 calories per day and exercising for 2 - 3 hours 6 days a week. Working out and losing body fat doesn’t magically make it go away, so don’t act like only lazy women have cellulite. Not only is it ridiculous, but it’s also incredibly ignorant (especially when you consider the science of the situation.)
These tabloids keep forgetting that Britney had 2 kids in 2 years. Of course that’s going to make it harder to have a flat stomach. I feel so bad for her.
I can sit on my couch for a year
and have a better fit body than
Katherine Heigl,
and perhaps, that’s not even
saying much.
JEEZUS tara reid looks AWFUL
The only reason Katherine Heigl is even skinny now is because of all the cigs she smokes.
katherine heigl is yucky looking, very flabby and soft.
well with cellulite all i know is i used to have it but then i lost 15 pounds and it all went away so i say if you have a low amount of body fat and good muscle, you dont have cellulite. simple
LMFAO…
I love when girls with breast implants are praised for being “curvy.” Even when their ribs are showing or they’re otherwise built like 12 year old boys, the fake breasts always get them an automatic “curvy.”
(Though I agree that Patridge has a nice body, whoever the f*ck she is).
abby -
cellulite is also genetic. and its not simple. you can be thin and in good shape with muscle and still have cellulite.
ABBY - don’t say the things you DON’T know… many many thin girls have cellulite, it is genetic and it is not simple!
I don’t want to comment much, because all of them are human, have good and bad days, and I don’t want to judge.
But the best of girls is Audrina ( from that list )
I think Audrina is more “athletic” shaped than ‘curvy’.
sorry, cellulite cannot be helped…its an unfortunate reality in life to some of us
Tara Reid and Britney Spears so do not look like that in real life…
To be fair to Britters’, the rest of of body is a big improvement on recent months and her skin is looking more glowy. Maybe her problem area is due to her meds, in which case, I would rather have that than another psychotic head shaving episode.
I feel bad for Tara and her belly, it must be devastating to be scared like that. I have to say, I still think she looks better than those skeletal bikini pix of her a few months back.
I had cellulite. But it disappeared after I lost 20 pounds and started working out.
I agree with you, Coco. If Britney is actually bipolar, she could be on a medication that causes weight gain. One of my friends is bipolar, and he was always in amazing shape, but gained 60 pounds in less than a year on a certain med. Unfortunately, it happens - and the person really isn’t to blame; the medications can mess with peoples’ energy, metabolism, and blood-sugar levels.
That said. Tara Reid’s stomach is much less visually offensive to me than her breasts in that top.
cellulite doesn’t ‘disappear.’ however, if you tone up the problem areas and reduce the amount of fat, you’ll reduce the appearance of cellulite. so, sorry… your cellulite didn’t go away, and if you stop working out, it’ll come back.
WOW.
i mean i knew this was a website for the, how shall i put this, “delusionally messed up”? but seriously people, this is getting ridiculous! yeah Britney is no longer a perfect popbot, but she’s SERIOUSLY ILL! for pete’s sake!
and yeah, Cellulite is genetic people, skinny people get it too, so climb down off your no doubt incredibly youthful high horses and wake the f*ck up, there is more to life than looking like Heidi Montag
OMG Tara Reid’s fallen boobs frighten me.
I think Kathryn Heigel is very pretty. Hate her dracula teeth though.
It is not just Britney’s abdominal area. . . it is her humongeous thighs as well. She has muscular legs and when fat is added it is a very unfortunate sight. She needs to work out and cut the carbs. And fast.
And poor Tara. . . her boobs look mangled. I thought she got those done over. Is that an old pic? If it is shame on In Touch!
ugh britney had two kids.. leave her alone tabloids.
Britneys stomach looks so weird, it reminds me of Amys´belly, which is always bloated supposedly due to a liverdisease.
Maybe Brit has the same problem after her drug, tablett and alcohol problem. Who knows..
I love how people are talking about being healthy and working out is the way to go but then are praising Audrina for her ENHANCED figure (hence not natural)….bunch of BS in my opinion.
Wow, Tara is looking rough. The tummy and fallen boob implants are scary. She needs an excellent plastic surgeon to fix that damage stat!
audrina looks more…had a boob job and according to american media that is all it takes to be curvy…any way hope the ’stars’ enjoy the publicity and beach fun
way to go in carrying on the uneccessary scrutinising of bodies
wtf is wrong with you people?
even the celebs with the so-called worst bikini body look still better than most of the average woman.
srsly…get real and stop being so shallow.
Tara’s boobs look like those of a 60 year old woman, that’s some scary tummy, too.
Uggghh! Leave Britney and Tara alone!
Britney has had two kids and is going through alot of sh*t right now and Tara obviously has an ed and we have the media calling her fat!! WTF?!
OMFG
SAGGYYY!!!
bells, and poster like her. I have a question. You are so critical of what other posters write. I am just curious as to what you think this web site is for? It is about celebrities and their bodies/fitness habits.
You state “quit being so shallow.” What would you like to discuss on this website? The price of oil perhaps? I mean seriously maybe they have a site for science digest if you would be more comfortable? Correct me if I am wrong but nobody is forcing you to partake. . . fact is you could just look at the pictures and not bother yourself with the readers comments if it upsets you so much~
Ivy- Agreed; completely!! So true, bottom line.
best shoulders category??? I don’t ever notice anyones shoulders; unless they’re like ridiculously broad :s
yesss can’t we just leave poor brit alone?! i’m so tired of hearing about her; she has more important things to worry about right now than being a stick!
Leah- Well said.
That being said, Britney has the body of a pudgy toddler, minus the boobs…yes, i know she has kids, it still doesn’t change the fact.
I’m with Ivy too. Brit looks horrific (sorry, but I don’t believe she is “ill”). Tara is proof that gravity works against us.
I forgot to add - GO LEAH!!!! You are so right. This is The Skinny Website. Love it or leave it.
My comment re: Leah doesn’t seem to want to appear. In a nutshell - GO LEAH - you are so right.
Oops - there it is (they are) now! I forget that patience is a virtue.
Bells, I am curious what you thought this website was about…?
Anyway, just because people like to spend time critiquing celebrity bodies once in a while doesn’t make them shallow people in general.
Looks like Britney got caught at a bad time…looks like she’s got a food-baby or some water weight going on. It’s not like she’s enormous, it’s just that she’s a little puffy-looking. Lithium will do that to you, I guess.
And yeah, Tara’s stomach looks weird; it always HAS. Her boobs are really starting to scare me though…those implants are pulling her skin down to her ankles.
And Pierce is looking pretty good these days. Not as ripped as he used to be, but maybe he’s working on that.
Pierce is definatly an great looking older man, and his loyalty/love for his wife makes him even more attractive
some of the posters on here are mean mean mean. There is nothing wrong with not calling someone the worst name possible for having a weight issue. If it were easy to be thin and lose weight- we would not have the obesity epidemic that we do. I think it is important to treat people who are struggling with their weight with respect and positivity. No one wants to be overweight, why do all of you have to be mean to people who are struggling? If Here’s a thought, for everything you want to say mean about a celeb- say it and then say how you would fix it. Why not focus on positivity? Trust me, no one cares about name calling, but diet tips and workout tips are always worth perusing.
to all those that say you get rid of cellulite just by working out…
i’m 5′3″ and weigh 98 lbs.i work out at least 4 times a week doing cardio and weights and have the body fat percentage of an athlete..and guess what? i have cellulite. there is no hope…
I think Britney’s looking a lot better lately than she has in years.
wow look at tara are you kidding isnt she embarrassed to go out like that after her thin photos this seems like alot of weight in a short time!! what a differance seems excessive
Katherine Heigl = best beach body? DISAGREE
imo, worst back view of any celebrity recently, if you don’t count old news like Britney Spears (though I hear she’s toning up)
It’s interesting that most of the comments have been about the women’s bodies, by women. Also, the woman “Audrina” who is applauded for her curves has obvious implants. My fave picture is Pierce Brosnan. He looks fantastic for his age and hasn’t succumbed to the current fad amongst younger men of removing their body hair. And he’s been with the same woman forever. Love him. As for Mr Farrel, movie role or not, he looks ill and at risk of ruining his health. Just shows that ultra-thin looks just as ugly on men as it does on women.
how does Mario Lopez keep getting hotter? Seriously he was cute back in the day but now its way hot
BELLS: Get real. This website is all about shallow. But we mostly have the decency not to insult each other.
Bells, the idea here is too voice our opinions about the celebs. Sometimes we may get a little carried away but, hey, we’re honest. And most of us do not insult each other. We don’t like that.
*Sorry for the double post.
Tara’s boobs are scarily saggy. Can’t she buy sth w proper support, for pete’s sake? Hugh’s body is, like, WOW. So is Audrina’s, though her’s is strong, not skinny, which is better.
tara’s boobies have fallen, and they can’t get up!
the only “curves” audrina has are from a plastic surgeon
aww i like katherine heigl, and i think she looks really good. her legs are just a little knocked kneed. and so what if she smokes? half of hollywood does it, and the other half probably do worse by tanning, eating junk, and breathing the air in LA!
i think colin farrell looks hot! i like my men skinny
There are so many retarded people in this forum.
Cellulite does not always disappear with exercise. Read a book. Are you slow? That’s like people taking a medication and because they have no side effects, the others who do must be doing it wrong or lying. Some of you have an IQ of 10. Brain dead.
Ahhh I really like Matthew McConaughey…
I think Audrina is really pretty, even though her boobs are fake… But Reese Witherspoon on the ‘worst bodies’ list…. why? Has she become that fat and out of shape? Have I missed something?
Sometimes I have cellulite and sometimes I don’t, and I am 5′7″ and weight 126 so not fat, and I do work out. Cellulite is life. I hate Katherine Hiegel but think she looks fine. But wow Tara Reid, and Audrina looks too skinny, its not realitic.
audrina patridge is not curvy at all!!!! ugh fake tits dont count ok “In Touch” ?
Like all the other posters, I disagree… Kathrine Heigl’s beach body aint all that.
Abby please give me your secret! At my skinniest EVER, I still had a little cellulite (not enough to be disgusting, but still). I definitly think this depends on body type. I have a little waist, and even my hips aren’t bad- but I have big thighs. Oh well. Some people tend to carry weight in the mid-section, and personally, I’d prefer my big thighs.
Audrina is not curvy. Adding two mountains to your plains does not make one “curvy”; it makes them bumpy. (Why are “The Hills” girls shoved in my face, always!?)
So you have take ‘pride’ in your body to be able to wear what you want eh? By that you mean become a gym bunny and no allow yourself to eat what you want cos it might just be too fattening.
Bollocks to that!!! I’ll wear what the hell I like with pride, safe in the knowledge I look great & knowing I can eat a big old ice cream if I want. I’m a nicely proportioned size (UK) 14 btw before you all get visions of me being a 300lb heffer!
I feel sorry for Britney. I agree with the previous poster who said it could be medication. After having 2 kids myself in a short period of time i dealt with post partum depression and was put on meds…I gained 70lbs in 1 year…it was devestating! I’ve always worked out and looked after my body and to have my body out of control with nothing I could do made my depression worse not better - i can’t imagine how hard it would be to have people constantly judging you and trying to deal with mental issues and weight gain! Hugs to Brit! Congrats to her for trying to get better and sort herself out!
Okay, Tara Reid only looks the way she does b/c of magazines like these–she gave into the pressure of the perfect body and now, the rag mag wants to critisize her for it? And, Britney has been through so much this year–I think it is sad that the editors and top dawgs of the magazine couldn’t at least have a little moral decency. I hope that some consumed star commits suicide and leaves in the note a message to the media and their contribution to the matter–if only it would make a difference.
Britney is still WAY thinner than the average British/American woman.
She’s had two kids.
She’s not been a stick for years.
She looks normal/curvy. Get over it.
Britney is going through a lot right now, and besides her stomach, she is perfectly in shape. Tara’s stomach is normal, but her boobs are just awful. Audrina used to look so much better before her implants. She used to be thin and fit, now she is like a man with enormous balloons on her chest.
Harvey Levin from TMZ and Peoples Court looks sickly, he has lost weight is he ill??